Father Knows Best?
I knew about this because this morning while I was driving around looking for parking spot I heard a clip of Dr. Salk's son on the Paul Harvey show. Mr. Salk made a very interesting comment. He said, "Yea, dad was never around much, he was always in the lab. He and his team that is. We didn't see him very much, because he was so driven to find a cure for polio." Kind of an interesting thing to say, and it got me thinking...are there jobs where family isn't the most important thing for a father to be concerned about.
When people ask me what it's like to be a new father I usually say something like this; "When I look at Levi I have no doubt that being his dad is the most important thing I will ever do." I still feel that way, and I feel like any father would (should) feel that way. But when I heard the quote from Dr. Salk's son my first reaction was to say "Cut the guy some slack, his work has saved millions of lives sorry if he wasn't around but he had more important things to attend to." Then I started to think about the kinds of jobs that a father could have that would be so important to the "greater good" that sacrificing significant time with their family is worth the cost. I came up with a Head of State, Senator, Soldier in a time of War, the President, Mayor, Public Health Official, Cabinet Official. But then it got a lot harder to determine what other professions could be included. Minister? CEO? Educator? Scientist? Artist? Musician? Astronaut? Doctor? Lawyer? Athelete? I can think of situations for each of those professions where the execution of their job is of greater importance than being with their family a lot.
Like I said I still believe that being Levi's dad is my most important job, but in all fairness I don't really feel elevated to be a guiding force in Urban Youth Ministry...so I have the time to be the dad I think I should be (and want to be). I am not sure if people like Mike Cope, Brian McLaren, Billy Graham, Max Lucado, or Rick Warren have that option.
*Disclaimer: I am only dealing with a father's role here because that's what I am, not because I don't think that a mother could have valid reasons or vital skills to be required to be away from their family as well.*
7 comments:
It is interesting that after all these years, that is still his observation about his dad. Funny what sticks in your mind. If your dad saved the world, but you didn't know him ... you can be happy for the world but wish you had someone you could talk to about your day. Being a dad is a fearsome thing ... I sure don't have it all figured out.
LOL at your "Feminist Disclaimer."
I think when the live's of other people are at risk or at stake, than the profession responsible for saving/rescuing/fixing the situation can be seen as more important - at the time - than his/her family. That automatically discards many professions from your list.
Maybe that's too idealistic, I dunno...
well, i can't speak for all of them, and i am not trying to speak for mike cope either...but i can definitely guarantee you that although mike is amazingly committed to his work and his ministry, he makes it no secret that his family is and always will be the most important thing to him. i have witnessed that truth many times, and that is only one of the many reasons that i respect him-if you look at his blog profile-he lists being a little league coach as his profession first, then a minister...and in turn, if he was not as committed to his family as he is, he would not have half of the amazing, touching stories to share from the pulpit...
I think alot of it comes down your standard of living. Many parents are working long hours not because they enjoy it or think they're making a difference, but to keep up with their standard of living. Many families can't keep a parent at home because their standard of living is so high.
Do you need a $300,000 house or can you be content with a $150,000?
Do you need a $30,000 car or can you be content with a $15,000 car?
Do you need a HDTV Plasma Tv or can you get back with a regular TV?
Do you have to dine at the finest restaurants or can you be content with leftovers at home?
So I think there is a serious problem when you let your standard of living take control of your family, whether you are a minister or a lawyer. Many parents are too concerned about making a living instead of making a life with their family.
President Teddy Roosevelt was a two term president, he was the first American to be awarded the Nobel Peace Prize, he was also a professional historian and naturalist and he had six children. He stopped work every day at 4 to play with his kids. Be where your heart is...
Wow...mom great thought. I talked with my friend Carl about this, and he said something interesting. He believes that most of the time people are unaware of their overall impact on society. Their own personal view is that what they do is work and that's all. So despite the outside world lauding their efforts the individual doesn't comprehend their significance.
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